African American

Soon after we arrived Rachel asked me if we are now African Americans. I love the insight that question gave me to how she is processing all of this. We are Americans living in Africa, so what does that make us? There are days when I can’t wrap my adult brain around it.

We’ve been in Abuja for over a month now. Our house is cozy and we plan to start school Monday. There’s always comfort in routine. Our neighbors are friendly and helpful. As far as living in Nigeria goes, it’s pretty idyllic.

But it’s hard too. Some of the hard is just the hard of moving. Missing friends and church, not knowing my way around town. Not knowing where to shop for the best prices on meat and needing to find a new hair dresser (so far I haven’t heard of anyone who can cut white women’s hair).

Meeting new people, trying out new churches. We’ve done it many times and although it doesn’t get easier we’ve been through it enough to know that God is faithful and will always provide.

Obviously, this move is different. All the same struggles magnified. The time difference makes it hard to stay in touch with friends, but we don’t have the energy to make new ones yet. Sean hit the ground running and has been working 10-14 hour days, often going in on the weekends. Internet, cable, electricity…they all work, most of the time. But, they need a lot of attention too.

The electricity goes out multiple times a day. We have a back up generator that kicks in within a few seconds, but if there was any laundry being done or something in the oven I have to remember to go and restart it, which I usually don’t.

Being used to unlimited internet we had no idea how many gigabytes we would need. We picked a plan and  bought the scratch cards that we needed to fill our account. In 10 days we went through what we thought we would need in a month! Sean was working late that night and it was pretty unnerving to not have a connection to the outside world.  So now along with making sure we don’t run out of milk and bread I need to periodically checked our Spectranet account and add internet cards to my grocery list.

Grocery shopping is exhausting no matter where you live, but that is where I have had the hardest time. There are stores that are much more modern than I expected. I haven’t been to a market yet. There is a good variety of items, but not nearly what we are used to. No chips or crackers or cookies that we recognize, no cheddar or mozzarella cheese, no sour cream. The produce is limited and nothing seems to be as fresh It doesn’t seem like much, but when you’re already out of margin those little things feel big.

I pay for everything in cash. The biggest bill they have equals about $3. Paying for $100 worth of groceries $3 at a time feels really awkward when I’m used to swiping and signing. I have to carry large stacks of bills around with me, which makes me nervous, and I’m never sure if I’m going to have enough.

Another challenge of going out is the attention we get. It’s rare to see a white and person and very rare to see a white child, let alone three little girls. At the grocery store last week, we were stopped twice to have our picture taken. One mother didn’t even ask, she just cozied her girls up to mine and pulled out her phone. Rachel and Jenna obliged. Sophie hid behind Sean.

Slowly we are getting used to things. It’s not all hard. There are times when it is a fun, well maybe more fascinating, than fun. The locals walking down the street with baskets on their heads, the newsies and venders swarming our car, every time we’re stopped at a red light, shoving newspapers, bags of eggs, umbrellas, sunglasses and internet cards against our windows. The things that I didn’t think twice about in the US are epic adventures. Each time I drive and I am shocked and grateful that I am not in an accident.
But, we love our home and I am confident that as the weeks pass we will all become more comfortable outside our 4 walls as well. I knew this was going to be a hard transition, I guess it’s just a different kind of hard than I expected.